Coupla questions

 Marc Maron was recently on Annie Lederman's podcast.  He mentions a couple notable things.  

 He says he has spoken of others' mental illness before, but he almost skates past this admission by saying he has some mental issues himself.   I have yet to meet a person who chooses to behave in a predatory manner who doesn't have such issues.  Spending 30+ years chasing these girls, leaving these vulnerable much younger girls in worse condition, ignoring suicidal pleas and referring to these girls as being great to fuck, while calling them "lunatics" when he is done, is not normal mental behavior in my mind.  Doesn't excuse that behavior, either.

And that brings me to the 2nd thing he said.  While once again trying to say these girls are the ones at fault for coming after him, he said he is unable to say "no" to having sex with these girls he has been drawing in since his Conan days when he started asking teen girls to "throw him a bone." Considering how many underage girls have responded to his grooming for 30+ years, this is troubling.  Does he check ID's? That would imply he is quite capable of saying "no." In saying he can't say "no," is he simply fucking them all?  The child he is currently giving a guitar, is being drawn in by him.  Will he say "no" to her, when she responds to what he is choosing to do to her, to get her attention in the first place?

These are the questions that need to be followed up on, to protect children.

Edited to add a response to something I figured I might see mentioned eventually.   Less than an hour and a half later, someone said, "Of course he isn't going to get sexual with a friend's teenage daughter."

So, it's wrong to groom and fuck a friend's kid.  But not other teens?  Why's that? And once again, deciding not to fuck a friend's kid, after getting her attention with an expensive gift, implies the ability to say "no."

Recycled

 

At around the age of 2, the CSA I was put thru by my father began, and continued thru my early teen years.  From the age of 5 until I was 9, the hooker who became my stepmother trafficked me to her clientele and used me in the creation of child porn.  At 13, I tried to act on advice I had read in Dear Abby when she told a hurting child to talk to a trusted adult about their pain, and I admitted I was experiencing SA to an adult my church held up as trustworthy, the sda school principal who "cared" enough to notice how damaged I was, and ask me if my father was SA'ing me.  He re-exploited me until I was 17, when I learned another girl had been SA'd by him and had attempted to kill herself.  In confronting that principal, he revealed there had been yet another girls at my school he had SA'd before me.  The girl who attempted suicide made my heart hurt, and I called the adventist conference president to try and have the principal removed from church-appointed access to teen girls.  The conference president started self-pleasuring during that phone conversation (https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/04/what-gets-stolen.html ), and when I stopped talking, he ended that conversation by saying that the principal's sudden move to another conference meant he was not my conference president's responsibility.   

The local church pastor who knew me and the other SA'd girls from our school, was immediately transferred elsewhere.  The new minister promptly visited me and let me know I needed to request my own removal from the church books.  Members of my local church congregation were making it clear I, and the other sexually re-exploited girls, had caused the principal to sin.  I was made to believe we children each set out to purposely seduce the principal, that we made him pick each of us to buddy up to and fuck.  I had to believe this, because I fundamentally believed older adults were always right.  I had no way to conceive of older adults being unworthy of trust.  Children who are allowed to realize adults around them are not automatically safe, are rare.  Children think those bad strangers they should never take candy from are obvious monsters that they will be protected from.  Children have no idea that respected adults are often the ones purposely harming children.

Over the next couple of decades, the list of therapists, survivor and recovery groups, ministers, psychologists, etc., I was guided and court-ordered to go to in order to learn how to live life less dysfunctionally, is long.  Each time, I tried my best to find true healing.  Trust is the key to healing for CSA survivors.   Each person or group I went to made it clear I had to let myself trust them, in order to heal.  I didn't want to trust. They said I was choosing to remain a victim by not trusting.  I thought that me not trusting was part of my inherent badness.  So, after some time, I would let myself try and trust whoever I was being told I needed to trust.  

Once I did decide to trust yet again, I couldn't allow my mind to realize the trusted person was doing anything wrong when they subtly manipulated our interactions into sexual activities.  I had to keep trusting that this time would be different.  With my history, I had no reason to know that not all therapists are fucking their clients.  I had only known sex as being a part of most close interactions I had with older adults.  I figured it was secretly a part of almost all helper-survivor interactions.   I truly believed that at some point, I would find the right therapist-type person who would fuck me, and it would finally prove to be the interaction that would make me a better person, would help me learn how to live life like a "normal" person.  That's what everyone seemed to be telling me, whenever they told me to go get help once again.

I didn't know that in order to truly get better, all CSA survivors need to experience the safety of not being sexually exploited by older adults.  Until they can experience such safety, they will always think it is sex they have to allow, to get any attention or love.  They keep thinking if they had gotten everything right to begin with, their original CSA'er would have never hurt them and abandoned them in the first place.  They believe they once again got it all wrong with the next re-exploiter.  And the next.  Until a CSA survivor gets to experience an older helper adult who does not bring sex into their relationship at all (not even passively), these young damaged humans will keep being re-exploited for decades, unless death itself removes them from this cycle of hell.  No one ever says that their abusers and re-exploiters are at fault.  No one ever tells the truth, that those predators spotted this victim's specific type of brokenness, then purposely groomed them into sexual conversations and scenarios, then sexually re-exploited them, all because the predator is turned on by the survivor's abuse history, and knows such abuse survivors are easy to lie to and fuck.  Then the predator can throw their victim to the side  and move on to their next damaged young victim, all while bragging about how these young humans are so "enamored" with them, call their groomed and conned and re-exploited victims "lunatics," because these CSA survivors have serious mental health issues that have just been compounded by this predator.  Nobody blames that predator for the how much more deeply damaged the young person is, and because abandonment after being sexually used is the worst anguish such young survivors can be put through, that damage isn't quantifiable. 

My first predator was my father.  I was handed by him to Pam, and from her to other predators.  At 13, I tried to get help by responding to the grooming predator running my school.  He caused more damage in me, and left me in worse condition.  He is, to this day, still a respected citizen.  Meanwhile, I was told I was bad, I was fucked up, I needed to go get help.  The next counselor I went to, drew me into trusting them, re-exploited me, I was told I had caused yet another decent person to be bad, my behavior was even worse, I accepted it was all my fault.  I went to a pastor who offered healing in the house of the lord, who convinced me he was never going to harm me, drew me in, got me to trust him, fucked me, abandoned me, left me worse off.  I was blamed and called demon possessed, and told to go get help.  And so on, and so forth, ad fucking nauseam.

There was no moment where anyone ever stopped this cycle.  At 13, I was saddled with blame.  Funny thing is, people will say, "Well, after 18, it's all legal.  She's a woman.  She knows exactly what she is doing."  And the old predator inwardly grins at how easily he can leave damaged teens suicidal, teens  nobody was going to help at 13 because they were already ascribed blame and womanhood then.  Afab victims of child sexualization/abuse are hustled onto the train of re-exploitation, and there is no place where they get any help.  Because the predators who spot them and draw them in and deceive and sexually re-exploit them are never blamed.  I was not capable of knowing that any of the multitude of predators who conned me were bad.  If any of them had been removed from access to CSA victims, my life might have been different.  If Maron is not called out, every afab child he interacts with, or gives guitars to, or gets snake drawings from, is in very real danger in just a couple of years.  He is a 59 yr-old man.  Who fucks 18 yr-olds.  Who leaves girls with mental illness self-harming and suicidal.  They can beg him, in replies on his page, to please not abandon them.  Not one goddam adult helps them.  Or even sees them.  No one steps up and tells Maron to leave these broken damaged girls alone.  Instead, more children are drawn to him each day.

How to spot a predator

 I was recently asked what to look for, to spot a predator.  This is a good question. I will attempt to explain a bit about what to watch for, and copy a couple of sections from past blog posts here, where I desribe some of the ways predatory behavior looks in real life.  I will also include descriptions of the behaviors predators look for in children, so they can find the ones easiest to groom and exploit and later blame.  (Childhood abuses create a multitude of dysfunctional reactions in young humans, but CSA reactions are often attributed to a character defect or choice in the child, instead of placing the blame on the abusers.  Sexualized children/youth are not born "hypersexual," anymore than children who cringe at raised fists are not born with a longing to be punched.  This is an important part of identifying predatory behavior.   If sexualized children are ascribed blame, those who re-exploit them aren't going to be held accountable for anything they do to that young human.  See the section below entitled "Agency.")

The best advice I can think of, to help in identifying predatory behavior, is to notice when/if you find yourself trying to talk yourself out of believing something you saw or heard, something that gave you a gut reaction.  The way a teacher with a student froze or separated quickly when you walked around a corner and interrupted them.  The neighbor offering to drive a child home from soccer practice, and the child's face registering a brief look that made you uncomfortable.  The older adult at a recovery meeting who offers a younger new member too much, too fast.  Those are signs.  People often sense something is off in the moment, then self-talk their way out of it.  This is understandable.   No one should be accused of predatory behavior if they are not behaving in a predatory way.   A helpful saying I learned from an AA member, "time plus behavior equals truth," is a fairly accurate way to measure up situations.  That teacher, that neighbor, that older adult, will have a history.  That student, that child at practice, that young person at their first meeting, may be giving off signs that predators look for.  Honest observation, and letting go of preconceived ideas about status and victim blaming, can help an observer see such situations more clearly.  

THURSDAY, APRIL 27, 2023

Hurts to see, because I know

 The adventist principal, who realized right away I was a 13 yr-old girl with "daddy issues," is on social media now. At one point, he belonged to 2 FB support groups for teens who had been sexually exploited. Acting so understanding, saying the words that draw in broken teens, buddying up to the ones he was attracted to. (This is otherwise known as grooming, something I will expand on in future posts, as I think people are picturing a howler monkey or mother cat picking fleas off their babies, whenever they read the word "grooming." Grooming is the act of subtly saying or doing things that can be said to be an innocent slip, but are calculated to draw in sexually exploited victims. It can happen in front of everyone, and other adults refuse to see it or admit what it is. Very damn similar to "dog-whistling.")  

Children with my history can escape living my fucked up existence, if they are one of the lucky few who actually meet a decent human who will show them how an adult should never be interacting sexually with an exploited child, but instead show that child what decency really looks like. Decent humans like that are rare for young exploited children to meet. Men like Mr. Maron sweep in, saying things like "I know you've been hurt. I can give you what you need," followed by that subtle wink that let's the exploited young person know that now they get sexual,...

__________

THURSDAY, APRIL 27, 2023

Agency

 Adulthood and agency are routinely ascribed to certain children. If a 10 or 12 yr-old asks me to buy them the ingredients for a martini, I cannot say, "This child obviously knows everything about alcohol, so they are responsible, and I can get them drunk, because it is their choice." In fact, a decent adult would ask themselves why a child knows so much about alcohol in the first place, and would realize something in that child's life is not right, and that child was in need of help, not alcohol. Yet a menstruating or sexualized child is often saddled by a twisted version of blame, a sick kind of blame-deflection, where an adult predator escapes any consequences for sexually exploiting such a child. This is wrong, and it has lifelong consequences for children who are sexualized and objectified, or who simply enter puberty as developing children naturally do, like getting teeth, and growing taller each year. Sexual abuse, and menstruation, do not suddenly bring any wisdom or agency to a child. They are still a child. Child sexualization actually destroys the ability to develop any agency. Brooke Shields' new documentary highlights this very truth.

Judy S. Lentz at 8:33 AM

__________

The adventist principal had dozens of red flags waving around him.  I went for years thinking nothing he did was wrong, it was me who was bad.  But when my children started school, and I started to observe their teachers, it began to dawn on me that the sda principal had been doing things that I was not going to allow any teacher to do to my children.  That principal often took individual students to Wendy's, for frosties and fries.  No non-parental adult has any business taking any child of any age anywhere alone, unless that adult is a trusted family member/friend.  And even then, a lot of children end up molested in just those circumstances. Any adult who is spending alone time with children not their own, is a red flag.  Knowledgeable parents/guardians should always honestly look at every adult they let their children be alone with or get close to, and decide if this person is truly somebody who makes decent choices, who does not lie and cheat and date much younger people, doesn't crack those jokes about "grass on the field" or "old enough to breed," or stare too long at children in sexualizing clothing.  Any older adult who fucks 18 yr-olds should never be buddying up to other's children.  If you don't know an adult well enough to know if they are behaving in these ways, I would definitely question the decision to let your child go anywhere with that person at all.  Titles like Doctor or Pastor or Coach are irrelevant.  If any adult spending alone time with children gets hostile if questioned about the wisdom of such alone time, that is a big red flag. An adult who keeps the safety of children uppermost, will understand why it isn't a good situation, and will not want any child learning to believe alone time with non-parental adults is a safe activity.  

All small children exhibiting overtly sexualized behavior are experiencing something that isn't healthy for them.  It could be any of a number of causes, from seeing tv shows or porn or experiencing COCSA(child on child SA), all the way thru the varying forms CSA can take. From the age of about 2 on, when I would sit in the lap of a decent adult, they would remove me quickly.  I was already starting to respond with sexualized behaviors in situations where healthier children do not consistently or purposefully respond in such a manner.  (I will not get any more graphic.  I know sickos get prurient pleasure reading about this subject.  I do the best I can to avoid adding excessive fuel to that fucked up fire, which is nearly impossible to do with this subject matter, and is probably why people tell me my writing feels angry to them at times.  I am haunted by the pictures and 8mm films from my childhood that are probably still making the rounds of fucked up CP aficionados.  Knowing my current written words are most likely being perused by a few such assholes is not a pleasant feeling.  I do my best to write about this subject in a manner as coldly as I can.  Letting anger infuse my sentences is probably a subconscious choice, on my part.  Can't bring myself to apologize for it.  All I can ask is for some understanding by those reading these words.)  

The day I first met the sda principal was a Sunday.  There was a water-skiing party on the Columbia, for 7th to 10th graders, the day before the new school year started.  The principal picked me up, and right away had me sit directly next to him, in the center of the front seat.  His bare knee keep leaning into my leg.  He joked, and would grin warmly right at me, if he could make me laugh.  That whole day, he made sure to make me feel seen.  Physical contact happened a lot.  Other parents and teachers were around the whole group as this was happening.  He was hugging other students, too, laughing and interacting with them.  It must've been seen as normal, and non-predatory, to the other adults at that party.  If I had, years later, ever seen any teacher interacting that way with my kids, my reaction would have been explosive.  When my twins were at their 2nd grade year-end party, one of the 3 potential 3rd grade teachers they would have the next school year was way too hands on with another child.  The child was not comfortable with it.  The hesitancy and darting looks in this child's eyes made my chest hurt.  I spoke to the principal later, telling him my twins were not to be placed in this teacher's classroom in the fall, and why I had made that decision. My classroom placement request was honored, but as I walked away, the school secretary followed me out, and said the child I had seen that teacher with was from a troubled home, and that teacher was trying to help the child.  She said that teacher often gave that boy rides to and from school, to help out.  I think she was trying to ease my mind by saying all of this.  The shock on my face made her step back and look at me differently.  I told her no teacher was to ever be touching my kids, or driving them anywhere.  Ever after, that receptionist looked at me like I was not normal.  If normal is letting teachers behave like that, I will gladly wear the abnormal label. 

Predators do not prey on everyone.  For some reason, a number of kids my sda principal never sexually exploited grew up to believe, along with their parents, that this meant the principal never sexually exploited any student.  To me, the correct feeling to have if you or your child escaped abuse by a predator, would be thankfulness, but that doesn't seem to be the case in all such situations. 

I don't know if these words help.  The person who asked me this question has actually set off the part of my brain that mulls questions like this over, and later hands me words to write about about it.  There will probably be a Part 2 of this post later on.

TL/DR- Non-parental adults have no business being alone with children, or getting physically close to them.  Friends, extended family, babysitters, etc, need to be vetted by parents/guardians, before children are left with them.  Titles are irrelevant.  A minister is no safer than anyone else.  Any older adult who fucks 18 yr-olds should never be buddying up to, or alone with, any child.  Young children exhibiting sexualized behavior are being exposed to someone or something harmful.   Predators will target such children more than others, although no child is predator-proof.  Sexualized children were not born that way.  They do not "want" to be sexually exploited.  They need real help.  Predators slither into their lives and offer "help" and comfort, a listening ear.  Predators know exactly how broken these children are.  They don't just groom these children, either.  They groom parents, friends, voters, patients, churches, school districts, teen pageant audiences, fans, listeners, etc.  Any adult befriending children should be scrutinized. 

Obsession

 Today's WTF Bonus episode is interesting. A few times throughout the episode, there are the mentions of emails people have sent, and how Marc and Brendan read and honor the emails that they feel do address important issues, especially for those who are paying listeners who receive WTF's bonus material.   Brendan and Marc both invite people to email them with these issues.  And Brendan once again mentions, "if you are paying for it" as a concept that might make such emails receive more attention. 

I have been paying 5 dollars a month for Bonus material since last year.  Obviously I am still paying for it, as I just finished listening to this episode.  I sent an email, "Well, hell," on August 30, at 10:01 pm.  On Sep 3, 2022, 8:33 PM, I sent an email, "OMG."  The saved IG Live reel I referenced in that email was removed, a removal I referenced in the OMG followup email, sent Sep 4, 2022, 10:07 AM.  Yes, like all emails WTF receives, my emails were being read.  My email content was never publicly responded to with any concern for the issue I was emailing about.  For 8 months, I did exactly what Brendan and Marc said to do, in today's Bonus episode. I was paying for WTF+ each month, and I was sending heartfelt emails.  The issue I am addressing, to this day, is an issue that involves the lives of afab girls with a specific mental illness brought on by a specific form of child abuse, a group whose members cut themselves and self-harm in many other ways, and suffer from the longing to be gone from a world where older adults they try to trust keep re-exploitating them for sexual gratification, later abandoning them and adding to their mental illness symptoms, worsened by the older adult who re-exploited them.  I consider the pain and suicide of such young people to be as important as every other group who experiences such pain and suicidal ideation because of the mistreatment they experience in systemic ways in our society 

Today's WTF episode, which I cannot legally share in this email, will have to be paid for, in order for others to hear it.  It is an episode explaining problematic WTF Podcast moments over the years.   It makes a point of explaining how some things from the past were wrong, and because of cultural changes, are no longer happening.   Marc Maron's grooming and re-exploitation of young afab survivors of child sexualization who have a mental illness created by that abuse, is ongoing.  Is happening to this day.  It is not some innocently overlooked past problematic issue he no longer takes part in.

When I realized, last August, that Marc Maron was choosing to sexually exploit young victims of CSA, it was literally the last straw for me.  I decided to speak up.  I could have spoken about any of the thousands of older adult predators who are doing this.  It was Maron's behavior that was my last straw.  I did exactly as he and Brendan have always encouraged listeners to do.  I emailed WTF.  For 8 months, I brought this subject matter to the attention of Mr. Maron, in the exact manner Maron and his producer tell listeners to do.  I am a paying listener.  This issue involves some of the worst consequences for those suffering some of the most damaging child abuses that exist.  Afab survivors of CSA who have BPD kill themselves every day, because they keep being re-exploited, and those predators who con them and later abandon them are viewed by others as decent people, while these girls are blamed for trusting these older adults who harm them.  I cannot see how these young damaged humans' lives are less important than others who are dying because of the mistreatment they experience in society. 

I finally found the strength to speak up for this group I belong to.  I wish, when I was 17, and spoke up about the SDA church-school principal who was preying on this same group, that I could have had wisdom and strength to speak about that predator the way I am speaking out now.  That's not how this works.  The reason young damaged members of my group are revictimized, is because they believe they are bad humans who cause older predators to damage them.  That belief, and the way society perpetuates the victim-blaming of this group, makes it so there is no way for this group to escape their plight.  They intrinsically need older adults who they can trust, because older adult helpers are the only way these damaged young humans will ever escape their hell.  Predators act like they care.  They act like they are the very help these damaged girls need. Men like Maron are allowed to prey on these damaged girls.  These girls, if they don't kill themselves, may one day realize how society fed them to known predators.   They may one day realize, when they are around 50 or so, how their lives, their anguish, was not important to anyone.  It hurts in a way I can't even properly convey, to realize my life, as a child, mattered to no one, because sexualized little girls are seen as "less-than," are viewed as damaged "others" whom it is perfectly okay to sexually exploit. There is no way to escape this.  I had to speak up.

In speaking out, it was Maron I chose to focus on, as an example of an actively-abusing predator choosing to harm the young afab members of my group.  If I had chosen anyone who is currently an active predator, I would be gathering information, pointing out the abuses, giving the very examples of behavior required by society, when anyone speaks up about those who are choosing to harm vulnerable members of an "othered" group.  The person who compiled that video of Joe Rogan using that awful racial slur, had a huge impact on others, because everyone finally had to see what was really going on.  That person(s) who made that video, had to comb thru years of Rogan material.  That person would have had to do this, regardless of who the slur-user was.  That person was not obsessed with Rogan.  That person was tired of everyone ignoring and excusing and explaining away cruel behavior.  That person was speaking the truth.  

I am not obsessed with Marc Maron.   I am doing my best to correctly speak out about the horrible, life-endangering behavior that is allowed to happen to girls from my group, girls with serious mental health issues caused by severe childhood sexualization.  The requirements for speaking out make me have to gather information and do my best to present it.  To try and diminish what I am required to do, by calling it anything other than gathering information,  is another form of blame-shifting.  If you must call what I am doing an "obsession," I will only own that word when it is used to describe the actual abuse I am trying to make others aware of.  I sincerely want young mentally damaged victims of childhood sexual abuse to stop being sexually re-exploited by much older predators who are publicly choosing to prey on these victims with no repercussions.   That is the only obsession I will own.  Maron was the straw.  That's the thread I have chosen to untangle. 

Response to this same tired mansplaining yet again, regarding age

 I have once again been accused of not liking the idea of relationships where there is a significant age difference.  If you want to skip straight to the link for my recent post regarding this subject, here ya go:

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/06/age-and-gender-identity.html

I have no issue whatsoever with any non-predatory relationship between any adults.  Period.  My specific issue is with much older adults who set out on purpose, with forethought and malice, to sexually exploit mentally and emotionally damaged much younger survivors of childhood sexualization.  Predators are able to lie to, con, re-exploit, steal the lives of, and then abandon these broken young humans, and because these young victims have behaviors often labeled as BPD, Bi-polar, etc, the very behaviors their childhood sexual trauma created, these old predators can place all of the blame on their damaged victims, and the victims are left in much worse condition when the predators are done.

These predators come in every gender identity, and re-exploit broken youth from every gender identity.  In our active patriarchy, it does tend to be older men who routinely seek out damaged little girls who suffer from horrible symptoms such men cruelly refer to with that still-acceptable slur, "daddy issues."  These old predators cling to that slur and other well known perv phrases, as strongly as other assholes cling to racial and transphobic slurs, sharing the same sick grins that racists often share when throwing around their preferred slurs. 

My paternal grandmother was older than my grandfather, and my maternal grandfather was older than my grandmother.   Their relationships were based on the ideas of love and family and life-sharing.  I know couples with age differences who are in non-predatory relationships.  None of the partners in any of those relationships habitually set out to compulsively groom and target and harm very young damaged BPD sufferers who experienced the trauma of CSA.

Only in patriarchies are adult men taught to see afab children as sexual. There is a reason all adult men who start talking about fucking young girls have that recognizable lecherous leer they all wear. They know what they are speaking of is not normal or decent. Men in a patriarchy have been raised to believe they have an actual birthright to fuck children. Men get away with sexually exploiting little girls in this society, and it continues to occur, regardless of whatever new feminism wave may be washing across the country. 

Please do not try and snow me with bs about it being "natural" for old men to fuck little girls.  That is straight outta the patriarchy handbook.  Nature starts to shut down old dicks somewhere around the same time ovaries stop releasing as many eggs. Human patriarchal societies are not at all natural.  Patriarchy encourages the rape of little girls, because that child can be lied to and controlled, if they are sexualized young enough.  Any claim that physical sensation correlates to age is not based on physiology in the least.  There is no physical truth to back up that perverted belief.  That is a foundational tenet of the patriarchy. Those sick fuckers who take that tenet to its extreme by raping the youngest of children, are creating fissures and perforations, which are horrendously damaging, painful, and scarring for the victims, while that sick fucker could get the exact same physical sensation fucking a bucket of offal.  The age myth is only in the mind of sick men.  Patriarchy has created monsters out of such men. 

Hope this answers the latest guys telling me about myself.  

Mis-defined

 We have all seen how deftly people change definitions, to place agency and blame on certain young victims of crime.  This happens regularly to children of color, especially those assigned male at birth.  Trayvon Martin was a child.  A murdered child.  He, and other young males of color, are routinely referred to as men.  They are not fully grown, fully developed men.  Referring to Trayvon as a man is blame-shifting at its most egregious.

Teens assigned female at birth are routinely referred to as women, whenever they are sexually exploited.  If you don't understand the extent of this problem, just look at the comments underneath Kyle Anderson's YouTube video about the Chris D'elia problem.  And then go listen to Maron, in recent blog guest appearances, wtfpod intros, in many of his specials, or other public snippets where he is speaking of the mentally compromised girls he re-exploits.  He refers to them as women, and if the listener is unaware of the ages of these girls, they are left to assume Maron is speaking of an equal partnership, a relationship between peers, instead of the predatory exploitive dynamic truly taking place.  None of these girls knows Maron has done this for years.  One of these current Maron victims did try to see if Maron had done to others what he is doing to her.  She could not find anything to warn her.  All she found was Maron being portrayed as a model member of AA, who was safe enough to be marketed to children.  She knew enough to try and find out if he was lying to her.  She is NOT to be blamed at all for trusting this predator.   He, and every other adult refusing to call him out publicly, is to blame for the damage Maron is doing to this girl.  Girl.  Not woman.  A mentally and emotionally damaged girl,  who is at risk of SI and SH, and using substances to try and alleviate her pain.  Her mind is compromised, and Maron purposely misuses girls disabled by such damage, to sexually exploit for his own selfish gratification. 

Maron's victims are not women.  Some on the left are choosing to refer to children and young girls the same way the right has done for years.  These misdefinitions are wrong.

Protect predators

 When a much older adult with a history of inappropriate behavior toward children is called out, there is often a reaction by supporters of that adult that is abusive, and shows the blind ignorance/cruelty of those supporters.   The right did this in Alabama a few years back.  I blogged about that during that election season, and a lot of my left leaning friends were 100 percent in agreement with me.  A girl was purposely placed next to that predator politician, as "proof" that predator was safe for children.  That girl was exploited that day, but because of her youth, she didn't know what adults were doing to her.  

Many Maron fans are currently supporting him being around teen girls, and giving an expensive gift to a 15 yr-old girl Maron is currently grooming.  Like any teen being exploited by adults, this girl does not realize what Maron and her parents are doing to her mind.  Maron knows nobody is going to call him out.  He can exploit this child and publicly brag about actively grooming her, and nobody will protect her.  Just like nobody was protecting this other girl in this following link.  Instead, they were purposely exploiting this child, in an attempt to make a known predator seem safe and acceptable. 

Exploiting a child to excuse a predator

Maron fans are allowing Maron to publicly groom a child, and that is as wrong as this interview from the right was.  The reason men like Moore, and Maron, can groom children, is because those children are too young to know how they are being manipulated by devious old minds.  The 15 yr-old Maron is currently bragging about grooming, does not know Maron will later say she was the one who chased him.  If he is allowed to keep grooming her, and he fucks her, he will blame her when he is done with her.  This is Maron's M.O.  He grooms teen girls, and later says he was chased by them, that they are "enamored" with him.  This 15 yr-old will go thru hell, if he keeps this up.  Just like every young girl Maron sexually exploits, this girl will be blamed, and Maron will have moved on to his next victims. 

Patriarchy protects predatory old men.  Left and right alike.

Answering some questions all in one place

The answers to any questions folks may have are most likely in one of the posts here from April 26 forward.  For the sake of TL/DR, here's a quick guide to answers regarding the most asked questions I have received over the last 24 hours:

Why am I doing this?  I posted since April 26 because a second Maron victim was experiencing an escalating crisis at that time.  As of yesterday, Maron spoke of an interacting with a 15 yr-old girl that included grooming-type behavior.  That girl takes precedence over anything else I was hoping to do.  This blog post explains further why I am doing this now--

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/06/caring-about-what-others-say.html

I am speaking out for a group I have never witnessed anyone else ever speak for, and somebody had to do it:

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/05/my-people.html

What's wrong with me?  

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/05/whats-wrong-with-me.html

These last three posts cover just about everything else I am receiving, both statements and questions.  Why are you doing this the wrong way?  You need to go about this thru channels.  Bitch, who the fuck are you?  Etc.:

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/05/poster-child.html

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/05/awareness.html

https://sighlentz.blogspot.com/2023/04/taking-knee.html

I am sorry

 Okay, change of plans.

Maron is the darling of feminism for talking about dicks, after he flashed his on set last year.  He is buddying up to 15 yr-old girls, and no one gives a shit.

Remplants/Rachel Martin

Ophelia

Tomatosoupbaby/Mary Jane Austen.

A perfect example

 CBS Mornings was just interviewing a person about sex trafficking.   A young woman, whose name I missed, was speaking about this subject that she is working to eradicate.  It is personal for her, as she grew up experiencing the foster care system, a system filled with children at high risk of being drawn into the sex trafficking trade.  This person is a hero, doing the work of angels, speaking up about a deeply important issue.  We need more people like her, doing this work.  

This person is young enough that there is still something she has not yet grasped fully.  When I heard her say that the men who pay for trafficked girls are often unaware how young these girls actually are, I wasn't surprised.   She still has enough optimism to think many of those who are paying for trafficked humans would stop supporting this illegal and inhumane industry if they understood the truth about how children end up in this industry.  She believes some of the men paying for trafficked sex don't realize how young these girls really are.  It was disturbing to hear her express this belief, but it is a common mistake made by those fighting traffickers, and I do not blame this young person for believing this.  She is a hero for a cause that she herself is still growing to understand.  

I was briefly entertaining the idea of sending CBS Mornings a request for this person's contact information, when Tony Dokoupil said exactly what I know this hero doesn't understand, yet:  these men paying for trafficked victims know exactly how young these victims are.  These "johns" are not going to be part of any solution, because they want to fuck children who are being malformed by childhood sexualization.  They act like they don't know, just like that "rescuer" guy in "The Sound of Freedom," who tells Caviezel's character he had once paid for sex, and didn't know the girl was only fourteen.  These men know.  These men are the problem.  Thay are the very men who are so hung up on that foundational tenet of patriarchy, "the younger, the better."  

This young hero who is working to eradicate sex trafficking is not at all a bad person.  She is doing what needs to be done, and I am so thankful she is fighting this fight.  The goodness and decency in her heart is priceless. One day, she will be better at realizing how men who desire to fuck young damaged girls, men like Marc Maron, are very good at grooming everyone around them to view them as unknowing, unaware, good-hearted men, instead of the predators they really are.

I am typing this on the fly, but tonight when I am back home, I will find this young hero's contact info, because I do want to follow her work.  She is fighting for children like I once was, and I am thankful for her, and all those like her. 

And I am thankful Tony Dokoupil spoke the truth.